Your Good Deed Of The Day. You're Welcome.

Ok, for those of you who are concerned about people with disabilities - (And if you're not, you're an a-hole. Not that I'm judging. But I'm totally judging.) The Lanterman Act is basically the only thing that keeps services available for people with disabilities.

Governor Brown's proposed budget cuts would gut the Lanterman Act's promise that people with developmental disabilities will get the services and supports they need to live full lives in the community.

Most of the cuts probably would come from imposing what are called statewide "service standards."

"Service standards" sounds good on paper, but what it means is simply eliminating the IPP team's ability to pick the services and supports that the person with the disability needs, the key promise of the Lanterman Act. The 2009 caps on respite care and Early Start are the most recent examples of "service standards."

Under the Lanterman Act, IPP teams write plans to reflect the specific needs of individuals, but with the cuts being proposed this process would certainly be harmed dramatically.

SO if you have a minute AKA if you are desperately bored at work and need something to distract you or make you feel good about yourself for about 20 minutes or so... all you have to do is go to:
http://lcmspubcontact.lc.ca.gov/PublicLCMS/ContactPopup.php?district=SD23
and/or
http://democrats.assembly.ca.gov/members/a42/AD42MailForm.aspx
(or the State Senator/Assemblymember in your particular district)
and let them know that you would like to ask for their support in the protection of the Lanterman Act in the interest of adults with developmental disabilities.

Thank you. That is all. Now you can go back to being an a-hole.

P.S. The picture is my brother, Jeff. He is very severely disabled with Autism, and the Lanterman Act has made an indescribable difference in his quality of life. He says thank you. More specifically, he signs thank you. With a kiss.

Sidewalks Are Made For Short People

I hit my head on a very sturdy tree branch on my way to the gym today.

That's not the worst part.

There are two worse parts:

1. This incident has occurred, involving the exact same branch, at least 10 times in the past 6 months.

2. On my way back, I literally had to think to myself: "Ok, so this time, you're not going to hit your head on the tree."

It's a sad little life, but someone has to live it.

It's Not As Easy As It Looks

I went for a run today.

I'm a little out of shape.

I felt a bit of, ahem, flem, in the back of my throat.

I tried to do the professional runner thing where they hawk a loogie over their shoulder mid-stride, never missing a beat.

The wind came up. (Not a breeze. The WIND.)

It landed on my shoulder.

UPDATE: Apparently my sister ran into a sign this morning on her run. Looks like it's genetic.

Riddle of the Day

A 5'11" girl walks into a room. She meets two men. One is tall. One is short.

After the party, one man says to the other man: "That chick is hot. I'm totally into her."

Which man said it?

Hint: The girl is me.

Have You Hugged Your Local Black Man Today?

Near the end of last week, I began to hear whispers of an upcoming holiday. Specifically, today.

On one hand, I was excited. Who doesn't love a good holiday? On another hand, I was not excited. I still had a meeting and an audition today. The only ways in which it affected my day were the increase in traffic, my depression around 2pm when I realized the mail was never going to arrive, and the fact that I had to use the ATM to deposit my checks. (I like real people. I don't trust machines. I don't trust people either, but at least, if something goes wrong, I have someone to blame.) On one of those hands again, or possibly another appendage, I was a bit confused. I couldn't remember the name of this mysterious holiday that followed so closely on the heels of New Year's Eve.

I thought about looking it up, but I had more important things to Google at the time. Like what time Yogurtland closes. I also made the assumption I would see it in some headline or overhear some conversation... in some way, shape or form, I would be informed by the time Monday rolled around.

False. I didn't find out what today's holiday was until I went out of my way and asked a friend via BBM in the middle of the afternoon.

I know people say that bookstores are antiquated relics that will soon be put out of their misery by creepy little Kindles - but where else am I supposed to purchase the wall calendar I so clearly need??

Please hold while I draft a letter to Blackberry informing them of their calendar fail. Because, clearly, this situation is not my fault.

My Gym is Trying to Turn Me Into an Idiot

With the exemption of a single vowel, my IQ plummeted.

True story: I asked the front desk guy if they could make a new one, after pointing out the egregious mistake that was made in its original creation. He stared at me for a second, seeming to search for the appropriate words. He then informed me that the machine that makes the cards was "down right now." I'm pretty sure he failed to comprehend the gravity of their mistake.

Let me clarify: Stacie is the name of the bright, promising kid sister to Barbie. Staci is the name of millions of strippers.

I Don't Know, But I Feel Wretched

Not too long ago, I pulled a Gigi move and forced one of my guy friends to analyze every conversation and interaction I have had with another guy. This started because I was explaining how I was unsure if said dude was into me as anything more than a friend.

I know. Painfully stereotypical. But true. Hold on, I'm getting to the point.

So, of course, guy friend assures me that other dude is into me. In the process of this assurance, he mentions that sometimes when a nice guy thinks a girl is out of his league, he is just sort of... shy about moving things along.

Right. Excellent. I left the conversation satisfied.

Fast-forward about a week and a half.

After a few more fun, but confusingly platonic, interactions with the dude, this conversation popped into my head. Suddenly an incredibly unsettling thought made its way to the forefront of my mind: What if this guy doesn't think I'm out of his league??

No, but really. I am actually disturbed by this thought slash possible realization of the truth of the matter.

Cue this moment from Clueless (Scroll ahead to 6:03)

"Well, obviously this boy is a complete moron. You are the most beautiful girl in Beverly Hills. And to tell you the truth, I'm not sure I want you with a stupid fellow like that."

Thank you, Mel. I totally agree.

Maybe I Just Need To Buy A Ticket

The last time I came to Nebraska, I got a callback for a Nike commercial.

This time, I got a callback for a GMC commercial.

Is this one of those "third time's the charm" sort of things? Because I'm really unsure as to what Jesus is trying to tell me.

Am I supposed to make plans to go visit my family, but then cancel last minute, crushing their hopes of seeing their favorite relative? I'm going to go with yes.

See you next Christmas, fam!